Lopsided Love: Tips For Keeping the Balance

Keeping The Peace

In life, whether we accept it or not, there is always an exchange of power. There is a give and take to everything. We exchange our time of 8 hours a day of labor for a paycheck. We may sacrifice the money for a much needed vacation for some long overdue bills. We volunteer our time to give to a worthy cause or it might be that we let our girlfriend win a fight just to keep the peace.

In everything we do, including our relationships this exchange of power is crucial. Not only is it important to share the responsibility of power in our relationships but its healthy. Giving up power is a release in itself. It allows your mind and body some time to unwind from the pressures of making important decisions all day and the stresses it can cause.

Let's Take It To The Bedroom

The bedroom (or kitchen floor) is no exception. Sex is an amazing, constant ebb and flow of this very balance. Even in a doggie position if you're throwing it back, ladies, that still puts you in control. If you're on top, he may be drilling away while you enjoy the ride. Somewhere along the line, someones in control at some point while the other is playing the submissive role.

Now is the time to begin to pay attention to your interactions with your partner and you'll soon be aware of the subtle changes that take place in your sex life everyday. Things like who kisses first or who is more oral will become more apparent. But for the love of all that's good and kinky don't get caught up in who's got the upper hand. You'll drive yourself crazy! Besides that, it's really not an issue, just an observation that everyone should be aware of in case things become unbalanced in your love life. This observation will be your guide to quickly acknowledging issues that need to be resolved.

Opposites of the Sexual Spectrum

It's true, our egos can often get in the way of allowing us the pleasure we deserve. You may be an extreme giver (which isn't all that bad). However this leaves him the inability to give back, because she is always giving. Any couple with any sort of connection to each other will naturally want to give back sexually. You may be a selfish lover (which is always a no-no). The lack of concern for your mates sexual satisfaction is just wrong and will eventually create feelings of resentment towards your other half.
Both of these examples are far on either side of the scale but are similar because there is no give and take in each situation. Its time to give up the ego and keep the balance in your bedroom.

For those of you with lopsided love, here's a little 101 on how to tip the scales back to an even steadiness.

1. Communication, as we all know, is the corner stone of any balanced relationship. Start off by telling your partner before you get intimate that you need some pampering. If he or she become angry at this request, reiterate that you love pleasing him/her but tonight you want to just sit back and relax and bask in the pleasure they bring to you.
   
2. If you are normally dominate sexually or initiate sex first, lay your ego down at the door. Sex is not a race to see who can finish 1st. Its also ok to be a little selfish for once if your are the constant giver. You and your partner should remember that this escapade is about your pleasure this time, so enjoy it.
3. Have your partner set the mood. Use whatever it is that gets you relaxed. A bubble bath, a massage, maybe a drink. Get settled and ease that tension.
4. Close your eyes. Let your mind pick up on your favorite sensation and run with it letting that heat become explosive.

Keep in mind that everyone wants some sexual attention now and then to make them feel special and loved.
(c)2008 Ever M. Famous